Death is inevitable. Most people, including myself, don’t want to die and there’s a fear and anxiety surrounding the thought of death. Gone are the days of your body being disposed of in a peat bog or lit up on a funeral pyre. Now the process is more civilized (expensive) and your body is carefully lowered into the ground in an ornate satin-lined coffin or cremated fully clothed to protect your dignity and your ashes are placed into an ornate silver urn. We’ve taken the original earthy idea and basically bedazzled it. #Crowlife
People see all sorts of weird and crazy shit during their lifetime (thank you social media!!) and I’m pretty open and intrigued by most things. I’m not a religious person nor am I a straight-laced, uptight bitch. I don’t have judgie eyes like lobsters do and I try not to judge others (unless the person is an asshole or a total idiot who’s going to become the downfall of society, which there is a plethora of.) Creepy, odd, strange and brilliant ideas are fascinating. Dirty and dark humor are what I love. People can be so creative and ingenious. They can also come up with ideas that make open-minded people like myself pause and say:
WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCKITY-FUCK???
What’s too far for this Dolly?
“Dutch designer Mark Sturkenboom has just created a sex toy that includes a mini-urn to hold the cremated remains of that special someone.”
21 Grams is a memory box that holds the cremated remains of your loved one inside a glass dildo, a brass key on a necklace to lock it, a perfume/cologne diffuser that holds the departed’s signature scent and an iPod amplifier to listen to the music that reminds you of them as you’re getting down to business.
How in the fuck would you get turned on enough to use it. There isn’t enough lube in the world. Your vag would just close up tight when that goddamned dildo started heading towards it.
I told my husband that no matter how much I love him, his remains will never take up residence in my toys. I did, however, give him permission to use my remains in a fleshlight type device because I know he’ll be so devastated without me. He gave me a completely horrified WTF look. So I’m pretty sure he’s going to replace me with a blond with huge boobs. She’d never have my personality or sense of humor but neither would a fleshlight containing my ashes.